Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from June, 2023

Dr. Latexstein & His Rubber Brain Of Doom

Why does every single mad scientist look the same? Why's there no variety in this field? Dr. Robotnik, Professor Farnsworth, Dr. Horrible, Professor Membrane, you name a mad scientist and immediately an image is conjured in your head, right? Specifically the goggles. They ALL have these goggles. What is it about these goggles? Where did this trope come from, because I, for the life of me, cannot figure it out. Needless to say, that's what we're dealing with today. And, as with most mad scientists, this guy is one ugly son of a bitch. That's another problem isn't it? They're all typically very unattractive. Big bushy mustaches, enormous noses, their brains popping out of their fluff of electrified hair. Oh wait, that's just Dr. Latexsten here. Yeah, you might be surprised to learn that - especially since you can't see it in the main photo for this post - you can actually see his brain. Wanna see his brain? It's pretty cool. Who doesn't wanna see a

I Was A Teenage Dinosaur

For some reason, I kind of want to punch Sid & Marty Krofft in the face for this, even though I know it's not their fault. I know they didn't make this mask. Hell, they probably don't even know it exists. And yet...and yet this gives off such Land of the Lost vibes that I feel as though they're personally responsible for it having been birthed from the ether. It just has that stupid goddamn look on its face that screams "I'm a puppet on a cheaply produced yet incredibly influential kids show from the 70s!" and it makes my blood boil. Somebody needs to wipe this fucking smirk off this dinosaurs face. All joking aside, I actually love this mask. In fact, this might be one of my favorites in recent memory. I've always been a sucker for the weirder creatures; deep sea animals, insects, dinosaurs, those kinds of things. So whenever they're utilized in a creative manner, such as this, I can't help but love it even if it looks like he's about

Over The Marrow & Through The Blood

Kids! Get your masks on! We're almost at Grandmas! You know, it surprises me just how many different monster designs have been created over the years, and I think it says something about the elasticity of what a "monster" can be that there's been so many unique takes on the concept. For instance, a monster can be a fully black mass with white hot glowing eyes, or a monster could be a tall creature with elongated limbs and sharp teeth that glint in the moonlight, or a monster can be a girl you take out multiple times who in the end ghosts you because despite saying she was looking for love what she was actually looking for was to make herself feel better at the expense of someone else (LAUREN), but no matter what your definition of a monster may be, one thing is certain: there will always be a new version of a monster. But so rarely do we get a monster that looks more like it's going to bake you cookies and tell you stories about the old days than actually do you h

The Double Headed Horrors Of Madame Greene

I really love old circus stuff. While everyone else suddenly seemed to gain and odd and slightly unnerving obsession with clowns online, I have always loved old circus stuff, but the stuff I love isn't clowns. It's the odder stuff. Sideshow stuff. The guys who glue two halves of an animal together to make a new animal they claim they found in the South Pacific while on a hunting trip or the guys who'll just bite the heads off a chicken while it's still alive and especially the old poster art they produced to promote their traveling horror show whenever they rolled into whatever poor unsuspecting sleepy town it was they rolled into that particular month. But there's nothing I love quite more than something with two heads. When I was a little girl, I came across a snake with two heads in my great aunts garden, and ever since then it's been just a lifelong interest of mine, the genetic mutations that are birthed from biology's seedy loins. So, when you combine